burn

you must never forget where you came from or where you are going in your life.
your road might be covered in a thorn bush or a beautifull grass pasture.
out of wich one would you emerge from stronger?

defenition of pyro
:n. pl. py·ros
Slang
1. A person who has a compulsion to set fires; a pyromaniac.
2. A display of pyrotechnics.

a single boxs of matches can burn a path or ruine it.
in the words of leon's " Dont ever be a corner stone"

when the road keeps calling up yonder.

a conversation to push or to pull?

Mr. Nothing's got a lot
He's got a lot to say
He's good at being what he's not
Gives nothing away
Another day goes on by
And he never speaks his heart
He takes his chance with what he's got
It's too late now to stop

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'
You give and you take and take what you got
Round and round 'till it breaks and
You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin' into your lie

Mr. Nothing is late

He's running out of time
He questions whether chance or fate will ever show a sign
Looks to the sky above
For a glimpse of what it means
And never never never make
Make no sense to him

You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'
You give and you take and take what you got
Round and round 'till it breaks and
You push and you pull and struggle with the knot
It's tying you up while you're fadin'

You push and you pull it

Civil twilight. letters from the sky.

One of these days the sky's gonna break
And everything will escape, and I'll know
One of these days the mountains are gonna fall
Into the sea, and they'll know

That you and I were made for this
I was made to taste your kiss
We were made to never fall away
Never fall away

One of these days letters are gonna fall
From the sky telling us all to go free
But until that day I'll find a way to let everybody know
That you're coming back, you're coming back for me

'Cause even though you left me here
I have nothing left to fear
These are only walls that hold me here
Hold me here, hold me here

One day soon I'll hold you like the sun holds the moon
And we will hear those planes overhead
And we won't have to be scared
We won't have to be, we won't have to be scared

You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me

You're coming back to me

foto na dans- soldaatvolk

Volg sirene om te herinner.
Vrees om te vergaan
Aangetrek om so te verskil.
Vrees om te vergaan.
Waardering geheg
Aan potensiële verbeuring
So was ek ge-lepelvoer
‘n Spieëlbeeld van ons ouers.
So was elkeen waarop ek nou rus.

My gedagtes behoort agter tralies
Daar's net plek vir een in my kis.
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk hoe alles vergaan.

Resies gehou tot my bodem
Terwyl ek telling hou
Telling van ‘n borrel begeerte
Begeerte na bo.
Verweer sodra. Sodra die nommer my naam oorneem
Gekam om in te pas.
Sodat niemand sal agterkom nie.

My gedagtes behoort agter tralies
Daar's net plek vir een in my kis.
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk hoe alles vergaan.

My gedagtes behoort agter tralies
Daar's net plek vir een in my kis.
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk....
Ek kon net kyk hoe alles vergaan.

Foto na dans- soldaatvolk

someone like you.

I was going through old photo's recently , when i found a photo that made me shudder. it takes you back to a moment in time where you want to lock yourself in a corner, together with all the promises that was kept by no one. but somehow i always got up. forgave. trusted. she still sang. remember to breath. always just breath.

A photo has the hidden ability to disguise a smile. broken heart.love. It is a moment captured in time -as in you will literally never feel, look, cry , contain yourself like that ever again. i call it
" the blue tango". It 's the intense dance you do with your inner voice and your "blues".It either tells you to be brave and jump face first into a spinning bike or to step back and double bounce the situation to see if you might be sleeping?. "why should she cry?if her eyes are already blue"

There is so much that time can never erase. things that you will hold with you for the rest of your life. It catches the life you had a that moment. The life you will never return to. The scars and the brilliant disguises. Fight to change always and never settle for the blue tango. In the brilliant words of Greg Carlin - "arm yourself my love" .Let go of all that is left yesterday and it's school boy charm, Get another round of Tequila and dance with the devil.


i am alive and ready. my heart can be your home. you are the narrator to your story, so make it count. be yourself on every photo , be true to the moment and never look back. droom verlore. maybe it's time to put the gun down that you repeatedly shoot yourself in the heart with. Moulin Rouge the shit out of it baby.

"I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Never mind
I'll find someone like you. "

"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Adele - Someone like you.

the story - for you.

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you


I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby I broke them all for you
Because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do
I was made for you


You see the smile that's on my mouth
It's hiding the words that don't come out
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head is a mess
No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what
I've been through like you do
And I was made for you...


All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...


I was made for you...

the story- Brandi carlile

oupa van zyl.

Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.
my grand father would have been 85 years old today.

he had such a celebrated and full life with three beautiful children , who grew up to be my dad and two aunts. when i see my dad i see my grand father's spirit in him, focused, yet emotional, balanced yet stern. i am privileged enough to be the only grand child who could remember this remarkable strong surgeon, with his thick brown glasses and white moustache that was always covered in Turkish delight.. he was a well respected man in the community of Rustenburg and even the mayor at one stage.

he would be so proud of his three children and his wife for being the back bone since his death. at her age she still makes you listen with a look. it has almost been ten years since his death and some days i wonder if he was still here what would he have said about an African safari, a car accident or another grandchild..or what he would have said about a divorce, pain and heartache. if it wasn't for this man i would not have the loving father and friend that i have today nor two remarkable doctors that i would gladly put my trust in and drink with any day..

your red chair and your magic that you gave us will always be remembered.today will always be your day.

Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
~T.S. Eliot

there's a still in the street.

There’s a still in the street outside your window
You’re keepin’ secrets on your pillow
Let me inside, no cause for alarm
I promise tonight not to do no harm
I promise you baby,I won't be no harm

And we're caught up in the crossfire
A heaven and hell
And were searching for shelter
Lay your body down...

Watching your dress as you turn down the light
I forget all about the storm outside
Dark clouds roll their way over town
Heartache and pain came pouring down like
Chaos in the rain
They're handing it out ..


And we're caught up in the crossfire
Heaven and hell
And were searching for shelter
Lay your body down...

Tell the devil that he can go back from where he came
His fire he airs all through their beating vein.
And when the hardest part is over we'll be here
And our dreams will break the boundaries of our fears
Boundaries of our fears

Lay your body down

Next to mine....


cross fire- brandon flowers.

what is this feeling..

What a waste of time. When you are feeling like your heart just head budded the floor and you are keeping your chest together to not fall apart. Yes, I am saying what a waste of fucking time. Emphasizing the ‘you ‘in insignificant.this might be mistaken for "in love" "love" or pure muffin bliss. BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE...


How interesting is it that the moment you become cynical things become easier.” Oh why don’t you go for a walk with me”, the man said. When you crossed the bridge he threw you over and sat down to drink expensive whiskey.


So this is my question I am going to pose to your lovely faces: “to go cold turkey or gradually wean one off of this filthy love struck shit? Well I have tried the slow method and it did not work for this double crusted pizza. So now I have deleted and said good night. I ended the burning stick with a pot of cold ice deliciousness. like a really bad Afrikaans music video.


You see it‘s like a game.(apparently) for those of you who did not know this, welcome.

No, maybe this time you won’t be lucky Liza, has it worked for you in the past? Audit the pass word to your heart or change the locks. Do whatever, but keep it to a drinking buddy and the game face on.

So the next time you are fooling around wear a condom because the boy you may produce might just be one of the douchbagg whiskey drinkers.




"
WHAT IS THIS FEELING
SO SUDDEN AND NEW?


I FELT THE MOMENT
I LAID EYES ON YOU ...


MY PULSE IS RUSHING ...


MY HEAD IS REELING ...


MY FACE IS FLUSHING ...


WHAT IS THIS FEELING?
FERVID AS A FLAME
DOES IT HAVE A NAME?
YES!:
LOATHING
UNADULTERATED LOATHING ...

FOR YOUR FACE...


YOUR VOICE ...


YOUR CLOTHING ...

LET'S JUST SAY -- I LOATHE IT ALL!
EV'RY LITTLE TRAIT, HOWEVER SMALL
MAKES MY VERY FLESH BEGIN TO CRAWL
WITH SIMPLE UTTER LOATHING
THERE'S A STRANGE EXHILARATION
IN SUCH TOTAL DETESTATION
IT'S SO PURE! SO STRONG!
THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST
STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST
AND I WILL BE LOATHING

LOATHING YOU

MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!

THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST
STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST ALL
AND I WILL BE LOATHING
FOR FOREVER LOATHING
TRULY, DEEPLY LOATHING YOU LOATHING YOU
FOR MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!

UNADULTERATED LOATHING"

wicked the musical- what is this feeling.

you live..

this week was one of those where you get kicked in your throat and the it is expected of you to stop crying and get up. wussy. (insert swear word here)shurrup and let me see your jazz hands bitch.
but just like any lesson learned you go by it day by day. and you realize that you should stop sweating the small stuff and love every moment of being alive. sure, it 's a tough job sometimes “It's always darkest before it
turns absolutely pitch black.”
this is from me to you. your last mistake will be your greatest lesson. flaffie ons doen dit nie nou weer nie, hoor jy vir my. n man is n bok en n bok is n bliksem.

-->

I recommend getting your
heart trampled on to anyone
I recommend walking around naked in your living
room
Swallow it down (what a jagged little pill)
It feels so good
(swimming in your stomach)
Wait until the dust settles

You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose
you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn

I recommend
biting off more than you can chew to anyone
I certainly, certainly,
certainly do
I recommend sticking your foot in your mouth at anytime
Feel free
Throw it down (the caution blocks you from the wind)
Hold
it up (to the rays)
You wait and see when the smoke clears


Wear it out (the way a three-year-old would do)
Melt it down
(you're gonna have to eventually anyway)
The fire trucks are coming up
around the bend


You grieve you learn
You choke
you learn
You laugh you learn
You choose you learn
You pray you
learn
You ask you learn
You live you learn

"alanis morisette- you learn"

happy birthday my baby.

mister hat and coffee..

it 's strange how some people will stay with you for the rest of your life-the impression they made was inevitably there to either haunt you, leave you scratching your brain or smiling.


last night as i was lying in bed i thought of one such a person that i had the non privilege of meeting in my life. Satan had to come form somewhere and this lady might just be his mother. with her anorexic , sarcastic coffee diet she was one of the most miserable people i have ever met. there are so many things that i could have said to this woman- except when i swore at her on stage. you just learn how to switch yourself off. something i could never do but remarkably taught myself

.Satan's mother came and went.

then there was mister hat. somewhere along the way mister hat fell in the Jordan and drowned himself in a can fruit bottle.the cracks were there .it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth- bitter sweet?would my life have been better without mister hat?

then you meet someone briefly and never forget them.

there are people that i could not imagine not meeting. sensitive boy. klipkerskind.bikeboy.they all have their own paths and lives now. married or soon to be,in a different time zone or just working damn hard...and when you think back many of these moments and situations made you who you are today.or not. your choice.

meet someone today with an open mind. love them or leave them. but acknowledge them first. mag jy net die mooi onthou.

vyftig randtjies vir jou

starting a new job is absolutely terrifying. especially when you are starting on the radio. i have never ever done a radio show, although i can talk circles around you while you stand and stare vacantly praying that Jesus must save you..i walked into an amazing team, that helped me with every button ,every google and phone call. i have fallen in love with Afrikaans music all over again and made real grown up friends. without all of them alas the lord giveth..although getting up every morning at 5 is a little bit of a drag, it is getting easier. ja sure. remember your blue jeans and David bowie..reading the weather and talking about carpet burns on international radio is fast becoming too easy.

"nee, pappa ,nee" will never have the same meaning to me ever again. and writing my own dictionary is fast becoming a potent reality.it is a pleasure .

vat jou vyftig randtjies en gaan koop vir jou ietsie moois.

you live to crutch another day.

so i have not been here for a while .


i went running on a ordinary Monday afternoon and fell over my own two feet down a nicely tarred road . downhill. and tore my ankle ligaments. just a regular Nash thing to do to get my injury in for the year.it could have been much worse. if you know me you wont even notice the crutches, unless your a guy and it affects you, but he played his role well picked up and said time to go, it doesn't rain but it pours. this is my fifth time on crutches so i am basically like a circus pony on them. I'm over the cursing of the universe and all that, i just silently fall into this sticky mess of sadness. but at a certain point i get so irritated with either the crutches, the plate i just dropped or myself. so its also understandable that everyone watches me with forks and lashings ready.

but today i was brave and outstanding in my choices. i decided to throw the crutches and dance. now remember i tore these bubblegum delights two weeks ago and that is about as much sitting on my ass time as i can handle. but i never refuse to believe. be save and loose your chance. push a little and a new story begins with your courage. i got out of bed this morning with my blue little friend and i danced my heart out for 4 hours. and if your a Doctor or a physio you should have not even started reading this- because i am not normal, my feet will never take me on normal journeys, my mouth will always speak the truth,my knees will always have healing scabs and my legs tell the stories of where i will never go again.


I may sometimes be weaving thin to the core and throw myself face first into these cluster fucks. but I'm not a Budweiser and bowling kind of in the -middle -of- nothing -girl,if you take the time to get to know what I'm all about and how many roads i will follow you down,the story and weight of your timeless efforts will be your reward.

and i will be damned if I'm too afraid of breaking along the way.

so yes, i am in absolute agony , but with a ear to ear smile. me and my blue companion are shouting at each other, but eventually the painkillers will drown it out. and i will still be smiling.
and maybe later i 'll challenge you to a dance off on die Heuwels Fantasties. you ain't seen the crutching dubstep hidden ankle yet.

here 's looking at you kid.

I have always admired the light behind a child's eyes. the pure joy of small things and the careless falling all over. the attitude of ' i don't like you" and the balls to throw a tantrum if things ain't going their way.

today i will be careless.

i will be free.

i will not beg you to love or even like me.

i will walk around bare foot.

i will love being here. and just being.me.

i will give you the benefit of the doubt.

i will love you , even if you care to ignore me.

i will eat cake and make up my face with jelly tots and cream.

i will cry when i am sad, real tears. real loud.

sometimes the beauty is in the end - when everything comes together. and there is romance all around you if you choose to see it and not be afraid.

lights off.

sometimes you wish you could just climb out of your skin and try to understand some choices being made or answers given. or that i had a shower that transforms into a time machine so i could smack myself for ever having this up surd idea.


you think you see how amazing someone is at first and then you realize you just had something in your eye. you mend your heart to have it broken again. my message in a bottle comes in liquid form nowadays. sometimes in life the search for order falsifies.your world can be undermined, taken apart and reduced to absolute anarchy. but then magically you can reintegrate it into something more than the some of its meagre parts. you realize and understand that its just the way that that person feels. and you force yourself to become reserved where necessary and collected when confronted. and flying on a wing and a prayer is a no-go-zone anymore. reality sets in once more.get yourself up, snort some zoloft and have a fag. NEXT!




"You knock on her door
She don’t recognise your voice no more
So she got on an aeroplane
Na na na na na so long after
Strip down from the fever
Laid down in a hotel bed
Wouldn’t take no phone calls at all
Didn’t want no more voices in her head

And that’s the way that you feel
And that’s the way that you feel
And that’s the way that you feel honey know
That’s the way that you feel

In the blue part of the evening
Sometimes its hard
She thinks she hears you coming
But she’s stuck against the wall
Oh she wants what she wants
So she do what she do
But now she looks at you
She covers one eye 'cause she can see into your mind
She no longer want to

And that’s the way that you feel
And that’s the way that you feel
And that’s the way that you feel honey know
That’s the way that you feel"
the kills.

nostalgia to remember.the last five years

the bellville house

my heart

one of my best friends

clara anna fontein

with you it 's better than mainstay

hello kykhie.

ogies en ninnies

i love this man

did we just win throphy's?

grandparents

first performance at aandklas

bruno

nera bonito

college madness

turkey teabag on eye

buena vista birthday 19th

oppi koppi 2009

new york

oppi koppi 2009

van zyl team

never without the wings 21st

first car crash

verlore liefde

boskind
three muskateers

dare to be diffrent.

"I was feeling sad
Can't help looking back
Highways flew by
Run, run, run away
No sense of time
Want you to stay
Want keep you inside"

cheese on toast it's that time of the mind again. where you grab fever by the the ears and down it with a glass of cold milk. destiny - it's not a matter of chance , it 's a matter of choice- so its up to all the choices you make. at the end of the day you made/make these choices because you believe in them.
i might not have money to buy a can of coke, but i can live without it - yes, i just went there and blew that bitch straight out of the bag. and when i strip myself down to my utter core of beingness, i will still be who i am- lessons learned, heart broken and eating dust a few times. but i wouldn't want it any other way.im not someone 's slogan- i am poetry.

February is national- boost -your -self -esteem month. no jokes. so you there with the pretty blues eyes and the heart dragging from your sleeve. yes, you. ek like jou soos jy is.celebrate who you are.do what you love. tell him how you feel and believe that you will make it. be brave this year. do something you never thought you would- because you do have it in you. take the train.stop leaving messages on an answering machine. and drive a powder blue bakkie because you can.you inspire more people than you realize. stop doing normal.because you are exceptional.

seek so you can be amazed, and dare so you can understand.

bitch be loca

okay, so as you all know the annual two oceans marathon is in April. and i have decided to follow in the van zyl tradition of not sitting still and doing the half marathon the 23rd of April 2011.
coming from a line of strong long distance athletes i have been running with the family for a very long time- just not on a competitive level- from my aunt who maintained her top ten status throughout the years in the comrades marathon and my other aunt running herself into renal failure i think this has been coming for a while. thought this year i will not stand and cheer them on , on the side of the road , i will be running . yes.


so i am challenging everyone of you.let's have a laugh- i will buy you a beer or six afterwards.

(liam bring your nike fabulousness and get down to cape town) ek vra nie- ek se.


training has commenced from 1st of Jan. through the dancing from 9 -4 i will try my best. my dream has always been to run the comrades and not die, this is a good start.
the Internet is a wonderful thing- once you have entered , there's no going back. so get up and start. i would love a running partner so give me a call fools.

RUN BABY , RUN.


http://www.twooceansmarathon.org.za/race/half

shortcuts, pink wine and such.

January has this amazing ability to make even the most secure son of a gun feel like a piece of insect on a windshield. why is that ? i wish we had a GPS for directing us -happiness approximately 231 days away. (thank you Carmen the garmen) is there some shortcut that i missed along the way? because im suppose to do it the hard way? everything worthwhile is always a hard ass battle? or is it? do we like making things difficult.

i might just explode. i need some sugar water please. carbs in a bucket. you look back on situations and realize you could have not acted like a shit face and this could not have happened. what if. what not. truth be told if you always go on and be someone your not- well that ain't going to work out for you buddy.you also cant change situations or think them better. it is. it was.

my whole life i have always been outside looking in. making excuses for people and brushing off. don't. it 's okay if...

if someone does not want to be with you, see the light..
if the guy with the jeep does not want to come down 10%
if you cant afford dstv
if you are impulsive
if your mother does not like you ,but she loves you
if you see an ex getting married
if they thought you didn't suit the job (code name too old- wrong colour hair, boobs too small)
it 's not you it 's me.
if they want to see you, they will.
stop staring at your phone. move away right now. slowly . yes.
to get smashed and go streaking.
to try and be strong- but you re not.
to not make the bed for a week- I'm going to get right back into it when i get home.
to stop believing what these Cosmo quiz answers bullshit be.
to hate your name every other day.
to stop starving yourself for other people.
to throw a tantrum.
to drink coca cola 8:00 o clock in the morning- don't forget the ice.
to put on a cowboy hat and pretend to be someone else. eg. DORA
to be afraid.
to bee outspoken.
to wish you were 12 again , sitting in your magic tree.


so bloody what.get up. dust off. use the two most valuable fingers God gave you to be non verbal and strut your pretty ass right out of there. things wont always go as planned. 2 years. maybe 5 - the thing is never loose your light- never give up . when the going gets though - open a bottle of pink wine and listen too some bob.
it's only January- imagine what you can accomplish by the end of June hey?..

kalahari hart

it is not the eye that sees the the beauty of the heaven nor the ear that hears the sweetness of the warm wind , but the soul , that perceives all the relishes of sensual and intellectual perfections, and the more nobler the soul, the more savoury are its perceptions. i have had the honour of being in the company of these sincerely beautiful souls for a few days.

I'm trying to sum up of the best few days of my life. you remember when you were a child and your father would bring you home some sweet things after work? no , better than that.better than shoving your fat face in a piece of cake.

we left early on the 28Th of December and continued up to upington , kalahari wereld. from the moment we entered the car the drive was entertaining , i mean with two of the people who can make me laugh so much that i fear vein popping in my brain in front, you know you 've done well- red bull highs and sugar rushes were imminent. from the word go there was dancing, pulling faces and a excitement in the early morning- pie - eating air.

then the moment we arrived in a thunder storm with the thunder gently teasing and the colours dancing on the horizon i knew this was going to be one for the books.
from a borat suit and washing bedding early morning- bonding even more with this fashionably sensitive boy ,but yet too cool too care.
i kid you not we had a bear grylls moment where a young boratting one bravely took a moth the size of my hand and poped it in there, yes. and then there was me who in mid air thought it very clever to jump off the bakkie (in the dark on a non tarred road- is that even a word?) i thought i would hit the road running. i . did . not. fuck.

what are you nasha? some kind of girl or something.

we did however catch the illusive spring hair a few times thanks to sensitive boy with his skilled doring boom direction.(n man so na aan my hart) van gatwip tot cane en oros. we did it all. we were even brave enough to go streaking in the rain with no light whatso ever ( dankie vir daardie een ogies) at least i can tick that off my bucket list - it does have such a ring too it - kaal gat in die kalahari. Johan bakkes would be so proud. the safety of standing in the wind with the warmth of someone behind you.the laughs in the morning about the night before and that every night we all would sit around this huge table and have dinner together.
the sun downers on the rooi duin made me think of being a child again and feeling that life can really be pina colada's and mainstay .
one of the most special moments were when i went running in the veld. with the sun just about to say goodbye and Africa reminding me how she runs in our blood,
time stopped moving and somewhere there i remembered why i am such a rabbadoo-
-returning to smiles, a fire and some sweaty love. doubt truth be a liar, but never doubt my love.

i have never bonded so much and so quickly with a group of friends- people i have known for years and some i only met now. but we made amazing , special memories.

and on the Sunday blues trip back i had to fight off the demons in my throat. but in order to move forward and make new memories we have to accept that this was and start planning the new ones. the only constant is change.

i feel it in my bones, that this is going to be a good year for all of us. may 2011 bring you love, happiness and all the things you deserve. this is your year.

dear friends, i leave you with this. make 2011 your bitch and i will see you all later.


Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes and leap

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...

I'm through accepting limits
'Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But 'till I try, I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love - I guess I have lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...

There's no fight we cannot win
Just you and I
Defying gravity
With you and I
Defying gravity

They'll never bring us down...

So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky
As someone told me lately -
Ev'ryone deserves the chance to fly
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who'd ground me
Take a message back from me -

Tell them how I
Am defying gravity!
I'm flying high
Defying gravity!
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!
-wicked.