i can tell you what i do not feel like. i do not feel like a schoolgirl on a Sunday night. i feel like a schoolgirl on a Friday night and i know that i can sleep my ass of and not be bothered. aah the bliss of going home in 5 days. yep. FIVE. but as you know my over active brain has started to scare me. i am flying alone internationally? what if something goes a little haywire? with me you never know. i might end up insulting a Turkish government dishrag or a king- something like that..or what if i meet the man of my dreams? totally besides the point but there are so many "what ifs "' it's giving me a headache. can i not just skip all of this crap and teleport straight home? so when i open my eyes I'm just there? i wish life was that simple- but it's getting thought the hard stuff that moulds you into the character that you are.and it will probably provide me with some stories i can tell over a bottle of wine- or nine.being afraid and excited at the same time makes me want to throw up.
i have been away from home for 8 months now- and i have a deeper understanding of the love of my family and for the love of my country- doubt truth be a liar- but never doubt our love for one another-
i have already started packing my bags and going through all the memories. i will be sad yes- but i will not cry- i will miss each one- but i will not long to come back- and i will remember each kind word and each insult.
bitter sweet isn't it.. i will be spending my 23rd birthday at home - bring on the champers and new thoughts of wrinkles, getting old and having babies. the Turkish chapter is closed and finished now. thank you too everyone who made it painful and pleasantly funny-
"quote :remember i am from a hot country and my brain works slower"unquote
booosh (crazy eyes)
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